November 8th, 2009

kettle

(no subject)

i really try not to interject with things a discuss' with her dads side of the family. but its becoming a problem.
for instance...

she ALWAYS talks "like a baby" (ya know, that super, chipper, whiney, cutesy tone that is not her normal voice) when she talks to anyone (mostly her dad or his mom, as she doesnt talk to the others often)
shes downright selfish and materialistic with them.
one day she broke a toy that her "memaw" (dads mom) gave her, called memaw and said "can you buy me another?" then yesterday, called to find out if she had mailed it yet. apparently she hadnt, so a asked to call her today to see if she had yet. (i told her no)
every conversation with her dad lately has been about her "wist" (online wish list) and what she wants him to get her for xmas.
he asked her about certain items, what she liked about them and such. she told him she didnt know, it just looked cool.

he feels like he has to have money saved up to get her for a weekend, because she always wants stuff, and to go places, etc. which i know is his problem/fault, but it still kills me.

i know children learn how they can interact with individuals on an individual level. if someone shows that theyll purchase their love for the child, the child will let them, and look for that. thats NOT how things are in our house. and a knows this, a knows that she doesnt get five, or even one, thing every time we step in a store.

so. in addition to the materialistic bit, theres the whole baby talk, dumbing down, bit. which is likely of even more concern.
her dad throws little ... tests? at her. yesterday he mentioned her writting some letter backwards, and when they were about to say their goodbyes, she inisisted she could spell bye, typed it, as "buy" and he corrected her, with disappointment.
i KNOW she knows how to spell bye, shes done it on numerous occasions. i know she knows how to do a lot of things, but for some reason, this is what happens when asked to perform for others.

i explained this to her, in the nicest way possible (saying that her dad cared about her and was concerned and stuff) and told her that if people felt like she wasnt learning everything she was supposed to, someone would intervene and insist she go to public school.

so that part REALLY bugs me. i know my child isnt clueless and ignorant, the way she comes off to others. im not sure how to encourage her to ... i hate to say it, but, act her age. in front of others (i mean, she talks like a baby and plays dumb in front of... nearly everyone that isnt us.)

advice?